Starstruck

Well, you really knocked that one out of the park, Kara.

Score: Pioneer Woman Book Signing - 1, Kara - anything but.

Before I indict myself (twice), let me say that Ree (the Pioneer Woman) is, if it's possible, even more gorgeous in real life then her pictures let on (and yes, even with mis-matched earrings... that, for the record, we were none the smarter about, though I did have a little chuckle noticing them in my pictures). And her nervousness is nothing but endearing... after all, how do you talk to a crowd of people who know your daily ins and outs but you know... well, nothing about them?

Her sweet personality just oozed both up at the podium as well as more comfortably seated at the table signing books, so you'd think I might have been a little more at ease. Not a chance. It was the heels... that I wore for Ree and her love of all things heeled - it really was. *sure thing, Kara

If the heels were my first mistake (as if she was going to examine my feet, right?), it was only downhill from there. Truthfully, the book signing experience couldn't have gone smoother, for Ree and Borders, that is, but it was a different story for yours truly. When Andrea (my dear friend who I dragged along with me... and the sole reason why we were in and out in under 30 minutes) and I suddenly found ourselves 3rd and 4th in line to get our books signed, my head started spinning. I had approximately 30 seconds to think of something other than a sheepish "hi"... and it didn't happen. On top of that, I'm fairly certain I repeated that prolific word more than once.

I should have stopped while I was ahead. Luckily, the nice woman from Borders broke the silence by offering to take a picture of us. Yes, please, that'd be lovely. After two unsuccessful tries, though, I started to see my chances of any documentation that this actually occurred slipping away. Thankfully the famous blogger-turned-author sitting between Andrea and me took it upon herself to let our photographer know that the camera hadn't actually fired and would she please try again. A few seconds later, we had our picture, and I stepped forward to capture a shot of just Andrea and Ree.

As fate would have it, I took this as my cue... yup, my entree into a meaningful and memorable conversation with the Pioneer Woman would be about photography. (mistake #1) So after snapping a picture of the two of them, I decided to inform Ree, she of Photoshop and Nikon-picture-taking fame, that if my pictures didn't turn out well, it was because she hadn't taught her readers (i.e. me) how to use the flash (which apparently would have cured all of my picture-taking woes). Course she's taught us all about ISO, which would have been an equally good (if not better) solution to my problem, but not tonight... on my one chance to talk to Mrs. Pioneer Woman herself, the only thing I had to say was to blame her for my less-than-stellar indoor (and let's face it, outdoor, too) photography.

She accepted my comments as gracefully as you'd expect, while I, after realizing exactly what I'd just said, quickly slipped away.

But I wasn't done... and I apologize sincerely to both Ree and Borders for what then ensued. As Andrea and I headed for the exit, we realized that we still held our yellow "group one" tickets; we walked almost smack dab into a very cute, very pregnant girl with a pink "last group" ticket - and to be honest, we didn't miss a beat. Andrea whipped out her ticket and offered it to our new friend, gifting her the opportunity to get her book signed right then and there, rather than waiting the countless hours that surely stood before her. I too found a grateful woman walking into the store yet without a ticket and handed her mine, just the same. While it's almost completely out of character for me act out against rules, those yellow tickets were burning a hole in our hands and certainly were right at home with their new owners (who hopefully were at home shortly after we were).

Other than that, it's not like I burned the building down or anything, so let's call it a success... or something. I did make it to meet the Pioneer Woman in one piece, and stupid accusations aside, left intact as well... after all, if you set your standards low, it's almost impossible to miss.

Bonus #1: Some Pioneer Woman recipes I've already scarfed down:

• Pan-Fried Ribeye Steak
• Baked Fudge
• (my horrific massacre of her famous) Cinnamon Rolls *second try, coming soon to a belly near you

**Bonus numero dos... if you've ever wondered why it took the Marlboro Man (Ree's husband, Ladd) so long to call her after they met the first time...